Sports Car

Millie and Sam were at it again this week!

Last night was their thirtieth wedding anniversary.


Millie has been talking on and off about a new sports car for almost a year now.
Sam never really responds when she gets to talking about it.

Well, Wednesday night, Millie told Sam that after 30 years of marriage, she deserves the kind of gift she wants. Not some vacuum cleaner or an iron, but an exciting gift.

She told Sam that when she got up in the morning, there had better be something sitting in the driveway that would go from 0 to 200 in less than a minute.

So, after Sam left the next morning, Millie ran down the stairs and looked out into the driveway for her gift. Sure enough, there sat a box all wrapped up nice and pretty with a big bow on top.

Millie ran out and got it, and ran back into the house.

She thought the box was a little small, but she was certain there would be the keys to her new sports car inside.

The real trouble started when she opened the box and found a new set of bathroom scales!

Well, I guess Sam took her at her word. She may have put on a pound or two!

Yall have a great weekend!

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A Day at the Track

We had quite a commotion over the weekend here in Lando.

We had to get Chief Wiggum out to Sam Jones' place to help get things under control. Sam and his wife Millie were going at it like a couple of squirrels wrestling over a nut!

Sam, Millie, and Mike

The way Chief Wiggum told it is that Thursday when Millie was doing the laundry, she found a match book with the name 'Shirley' and a phone number in Sam's pants pocket.

Millie flew hot and put all of Sam's things out on the front lawn and locked him out of the house. Every time Sam would try get in through a window or something, Millie would whack him on the head with her iron skillet.
After a couple of whacks, Sam decided to let her cool off a while!

Millie eventually put down the skillet and Sam convinced her to let him in.
Sam went on to explain that it was all a big mistake. Sam told Millie that 'Shirley' was the name of a horse. He and Emmitt had been sitting around the other day and decided to bet on the horse race that afternoon. They picked 'Shirley' from the newspaper and the phone number was for the guy they placed the bet with.

'Sea' Horse

Well, now Millie felt just like a fool! She apologised and helped Sam carry all his stuff back into the house. She apologised all night and made Sam his favourite for dinner! The next morning, Millie made Sam a big special breakfast and apologised again. Sam was as gracious as ever and told Millie not to let it bother her one bit because he had already forgotten all about it. Then he gave her a big hug and a kiss, told her he loved her, and left for work.

That evening when Sam got home it was just like the night before! Sam must have thought he was in the movie Groundhog Day. You know the one where Bill Murray has to live the exact same day over and over again?

ALL of Sam's stuff was back on the lawn and there stood Millie with that same iron skillet!

Sam got out of his truck and hollered at Millie (because he was too afraid to get close to her) and asked what was wrong now.

Millie hollered back that nothing was wrong, but that his horse had called three times that day and she wanted to thank Sam for the flowers!

'Shirley'

That's when the neighbours figured they'd better get Chief Wiggum out there before Millie killed Sam!

That's a lot of goings on for one weekend here in Lando. I sure hope things get down to a slower pace so we can ease on into Spring at a more reasonable rate!

See you all later!

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